DESPAIR

"I do not care much for Despair,

But Despair cares for me.

He dragged me into darkness

(There!)

In all his cruelty."

Dearest Alex,

The last few weeks have not been good.

I keep missing my grandfather, and I wake up from miserable dreams desperately unhappy.  It does not help that my new therapy is making me break out again, and now I have some weird red-rash-looking-thing on my drawing hand.  I know my naturopath said it will take time, but I'm tired of fighting.

You know how when you watch movies, or read books, you hear that expression (I'm paraphrasing here): "Life is crap, but at least you have your health."

I have not had my health for a very long time.  It's terrible to complain, because there are people so much worse off than I am, but though I'm not terminally ill, I have not been well for years.  A decade maybe.  I can't remember the last time there was absolutely nothing wrong with me.

So, I'm sad.

I try to work, but these past few days I can't see the point.  Does anyone care about anything I do?  I know my family cares.  I know my close friends care, but does anyone else?

I'm a ridiculously good artist.  I know I can be better, and I will improve with age like fine wine--that's the way of a hard working artist, but how can I be an artist when I'm too tired and miserable to draw.  Some would say that I should take this misery and pour it into my work, but I do not want to do that.  I do not want to share, and therefore spread, misery.  I want to make other people happy.  I want to solve world problems.  I want to make this world a better place.

Perhaps it is too much to ask, but if I give up, why should others fight either?

I wish I was stronger.

At the moment, I can't get the image in my mind onto paper.  It looks wrong.  No matter what I do, it looks wrong.

Perhaps tomorrow, if I can get some sleep tonight, I'll be able to figure out what it is that I'm doing wrong.

My article on sketching is roughed out, but I want to find some images to illustrate my point, so it may take me a few days more to finish.

On the bright side, I have sold a few more prints, and maybe soon I'll be able to donate my first check to Sick Kids.  It's not much, but every little bit helps.  Maybe when people out there figure out I exist, I'll be able to raise more funds.

Talk to you later.

M

AIMH--Another Page Done!

Dearest Alex,

I just have to write and say that another page (or actually 4 pages if you want to be precise, since I merged 2 two-page spreads into a 1 two-page spread) is done.  Finally, I can move on to cougars and more drawing.

I need to update my site, but I'm tired of computers, so I'll leave that for another day.  I also need to finish my Horsing Around Blog, but I don't have it in me at the moment.

I miss drawing, so that's what I intend to do.

Anyway, I'm including a portion of the image I completed to "wet the appetite", as they say.

Will write more later!

M

WEBSITE DOWN!!!

Alex!

 My website is down and I have no idea what to do! I've sent a message to 4goodhosting, but unless they can help me, I'm lost! The server seems to be down. I think I or Skype may have crashed it. I'm not computer savvy, so I have no idea what could be wrong. I will not panic!

Aaaaaaaaaaaa....rgh.

M

P.S. 4goodhosting fixed it almost immediately.  :-)  

Dreamweaver: How To Link Within the Page?

Dearest Alex,

I've been trying to figure out how to link within the page in Dreamweaver.  I've come across something called Name Anchors, but so far I can't seem to make them work.  What do I do?

M

2 h later...

I figured it out.  My goodness was the web confusing.  They give you the HTML code, but they do not tell you where to place it.  I guess, because it's logical after you KNOW what you're doing.

So, here's the solution in Dreamweaver.

Say you have a list of questions that you want to link to answers on the page.

1.  You click your cursor (design view) in front of the answer.
2.  From the top bar, pick Insert>Named Anchor
3.  Name your anchor.  For example: Answer01.
4.  Select the text you want to link from.  For example: Question01.
5.  In the Properties tab, make sure you've clicked on HTML and not CSS.  In the HTML tab you will see a window named Link and next to it a round type of symbol.
6.  Take that symbol (your Question 1 is selected) and drag it to the anchor point in front of your Answer 01.

That's it.  The Anchor symbol is visible in the design view, but it is not visible once you go to live view and test your page in the browser.

Now it's 10:57 and I'm going to bed.

Later!

M

Running Late!

Dearest Alex!

I'm so busy I don't know what to do first, so this will be a very quick update.

I have finally set up "Art: Help!" blog, I did not even know that blogger would allow me to have more than one blog.  When I found out, I figured it would be better to keep these blogs separate.  I've also decided to create a Horsing Around Blog that will focus on raising funds for local children's hospitals, and maybe somehow manage to reach potential customers in a more user friendly way.   However, I do not have a time to fix it up at the moment.

My personal site is begging for updating, and I hope I'll be able to get to it soon.

Now, my first priority is to set up this new blog, so that people can use it, and then get back to my work.

The winner of the Valentine Contest is my good old friend, whom I have not seen in ages, Jay Edry.  I loved his idea, and will be posting my vision of his idea soon.

Gotta run!

WTYL

M